How to Heal Yourself into Enlightenment?

All the people who have ascended tell you that you do not need healing for ascension. But then you do have your Ego/Mind that is telling you to try a million things to “fix this” situation that you are in. And you are actually in the process of dismantling the Ego/Mind. So, of course your Ego/Mind will try to control this situation to stop you on your tracks.

Saying that, healing is not bad. But it must be kept in mind that healing IS NOT ASCENSION. Ascension really does not require any healing but in order to get to the process of ascending, you must wear your Ego/Mind down. 

And I also think that because most people who have ascended have done some healing, this must be a part of the preparation for the ascension. Soul does not make mistakes. And there are healing modalities that can help you to get to the right place for ascension to happen even if in the beginning you are not able to use these for it.

I’m in pain. What should I do?

At the time your life is falling into pieces and you are under extreme emotional stress, your Ego/Mind goes overboard to find something that would help you out of it.

My Ego/Mind was very active in trying to do something to get out of the Dark Night of the Soul. Because I was still living from my Ego/Mind back then, I tried out all sorts of different courses and healing modalities. So, I spent quite a lot of time, money, and energy on trying out different things.

Here is a list of what I have tired, some of these worked, some of these I walked out after a few sessions because it did not resonate with me:

  • Sound healing
  • Gong healing journey
  • Shamanic drum journey
  • Chakra healing
  • SRT
  • SCIO healing
  • Inner Engineering course by Sadhguru
  • Cold therapy
  • Shambhavi Mahamudra Kryia practice for 40 days
  • Twin Flame courses by some Soulmate teachers (PS – very counterproductive for Twin Flames)
  • Twin Flame course by NewWorldAllStar (actually works for Twin Flames)
  • And many more…

I will write a little about a few of these in more detail.

Gong / musical / crystal bowls healing journey

I personally have tried gong and crystal bowls healing journeys. The energy of the sound of gongs cleanses through all the layers of your metaphysical body. This is extremely powerful. and in case you are in very acute state of DNOTS, this might be even too much for some people. 

Crystal bowls can also help you with grounding when you are one of these people, who gets most of their energy from above and not from the bounce-back from our planet. Most people get their energy from the planet, and they can use walking in the nature or hugging trees for grounding but there are people who feel sick when they do it because their frequency and energetic makeup is a bit different.

I highly recommend having a one-on-one session, not in a group setting. Especially when you are still purging and have not established a strong footing in your own core energy. Because in a group setting, you will inevitably be exposed to the energies of other people in the group.

Crystal bowl healing is gentler, and these are often used with gong meditation to enter the deeper states of meditation and later to come out of it too. But crystal bowls themselves can also heal some layers of your metaphysical body.

Shamanic healing journey

I have had many of these because one of my best friends is a shaman. We have both always had very profound visions during these sessions. Shamanic healing requires an experienced shaman. They use their drum and voice to work with the energies and mainly work with Earth energies. Since these frequencies are a bit lower than gong and crystal bowls are emitting, the effect on your energy body is also different.

I usually use the shamanic journey when I feel a bit stuck on my growth journey. Some people like to have a specific question or aim when they go on such journey. I like to keep my Mind out of this and only ask for guidance and get the information that is required to move forward. This way I do not limit myself with my expectations or ideas that my Mind might come up about my life.

Most powerful healing - healing yourself

There are two types of healing in general – using your masculine energy or feminine energy. And these are very different from each other. But can be used intermittently. I prefer to always start with the feminine approach and then if needed, apply some masculine energy. Most of the time the feminine approach works so well that the masculine will have nothing left to deal with.

Feminine approach - Kali

Feminine approach to healing is extremely effective but can be hard to handle in the beginning. Most people who start with the healing are deep in their Ego/Mind and this is in itself a masculine energy. You would have many questions and try to control everything – all things must have a meaning and a clear result. It is the best if the results can also be measured somehow – Ego/Mind loves this stuff.

Feminine approach means going deep into the energy that is causing suffering and just sitting with it and living it through. Without knowing what it really is – no labels – or where it comes from – no starting point. It can be something that came from 150 lifetimes ago and you would not care. You are just sitting there with this blocked energy and releasing it by observing and experiencing it.

By sitting and experiencing this energy, I mean you focus on sensing where in your body it is located, what it tastes like, what material it is made of, what colour it is, what temperature – you need to focus 100% on this energy and sensing it to create this image of the energy in yourself. Doing this creates the space between your own energy and the alien energy of the emotion that is causing the suffering.

Sometimes it is enough to put your focus on the energy of the emotion and it will instantly start to resolve. Sometimes it means you cry, sometimes it means you scream, sometimes it feels like you are dying, sometimes it feels like rage – it does not matter, you just are there with it and let your body process it.

Often it will be located in one part of your body and then it will start moving upwards until it gets to your throat chakra and releases. When it is stuck somewhere, then tapping often helps to get it moving.

The reason I call this Kali is because it clears this energy from all the lifetimes that you have ever had and all other souls who have been affected by this energy. You heal your ancestors, and the future generations also benefit from it. It is clearing out the energy fully without leaving any trace.

After this type of clearing, it is almost impossible to pull the same type of energy into your field again. After you have worked on many different emotions with it and cleared a lot, it feels like you become emotionless. It might feel like you are not human anymore because you have no reactions – you are able to stay peaceful and calm in every life situation.

Masculine approach

Masculine approach uses your Mind to dissect the energy into tiny pieces and rationalise it to “death”. This is much more time consuming than the feminine approach and sometimes because you are using your Mind you can distort the energy into something that it is not.

Using this approach always needs to find where the issue originated, needs to know exactly what it is and then start to break it down into smaller pieces to neutralise it by analysing and rationalising.

Ego/Mind loves this approach, and it is much easier to do in your daily life. If you use the feminine approach and need to scream it out, then you need to find a place where people will not call the police :).

Analysing and rationalising can be done anywhere because it is not making you act out. People cannot see what is going on in your head so you can take your own sweet time anywhere to work on your problems. The problem with this is one is that you can easily. ending up feeding your Ego/Mind and sometimes even may end up making the problem bigger because your thoughts are feeding the negative emotion with more energy.

Also, by trying to transmute it from negative to positive – applying positive thinking when the underlying energy is still there – you might end up burying the negative emotion deep into your energy field where it waits to explode in any future moment. This type of buried energy is also one of the main causes for all sorts of health issues.

My personal favourite

You might have already guessed it after reading this far – I prefer Kali. The reason I like to use feminine approach is because you must do it once, maybe twice, and the energy is gone forever. It is especially great to see how it has a positive effect on the other family members who have suffered from it as well.

Sometimes when the energy that needs to be cleared out is so subtle and hidden so deep that it is hard to get hold of it, then I use Ego/Mind to “fish it out”. I try to think the type of thoughts to feed it intentionally to make it bigger to be able to get hold of it and then still I use the feminine approach to neutralise it.

I have gotten so used to this after my DNOTS that killing these energy residuals off is like taking a cold shower. It needs some effort to do it, but after it is done, it feels so good.

How to heal without healing

At the time when you are deep in the DNOTS it seems that all that these gurus and teachers are talking about on the internet does not work. What does it mean when they say: “It is only one step from suffering to bliss.” WTF? This is your Mind going on and on and your Ego is trying to figure out things to do to feel better. How can they say no healing is required, only ascension? How do you do the ascension then?

I know now that it is only one step to enlightenment because I have experienced it. But to be able to take this one step, you will have to take thousands of steps that do not get your there. The truth is the one step is not a step – it is stillness.

In a way you must run your Ego/Mind down – you must run it into such an error that it dies or gives up or whatever you call it. In any case – it is painful. It is extremely painful to be in that state where you are experiencing DNOTS. But it is equally painful to get to understand that everything you thought you knew about this world, about yourself, your life, what might help you out of this pain – is not working.

I think it is perfect that this experience is called The Dark Night of the Soul and also Ego Death. DNOTS is just before you have the breakthrough to your true Self, when the Ego Death happens. During the DNOTS your Ego/Mind is fighting extremely hard at its last breath, and it is very painful and feels like it will never end. A seemingly totally hopeless situation.

The Ego Death happens when the Ego/Mind has lost the battle and collapses. Also, extremely painful experience but after this there is emptiness. This emptiness is also called the Void. It is like a moment before birth – it is not comfortable, but it is also not too bad. But this is not your Soul energy yet. It is the time when your Ego/Mind is at a standstill waiting to reboot and your Soul has not yet got your focus. Some people experience it for a few hours, some for days or weeks.

Your first thought would be – “Is this what living in a Soul energy feels like, doesn’t feel good at all.” It feels like you feel absolutely nothing about anything in this world. You just do not care.

After this your Ego/Mind will try to reboot again. Now this is the time to make that one step that takes you out of it – practicing stillness, presence, just being…

Being Present - opening the door to your Soul

Meditation is a daily tool that I use. All the things in the last sentence are wrong. It is not a tool – it is a state of being. You cannot use it; you can only experience it. I would say that it is the state of being present.

Being is healing

These days I meditate every morning and evening for about 20-60 minutes. But most of the time I live in a meditative state anyway. These morning and evening sessions are where I sit down in a quiet place and close my eyes.

During the darkest days of my Ego Death, I meditated for hours every day. When I was meditating the pain was a little easier to tolerate and there was nothing else, I could help myself besides taking cold showers. At this time, I had a lot of visions during the meditation which indicates that I was actually not able shift into my Soul energy but was still surfing around on the astral plane of duality.

The real meditation is a lot deeper and less visual because at the singularity level there is emptiness, peace, silence, and nothingness. You can still have some slight visions, but these are more of the knowing than visual information coming to you.

You can also meditate in every other moment of your daily life. Having a shower, washing dishes – you focus on feeling the water on your skin and the temperature of the water, the materials you are handling. 100% there – present in meditation.

It is possible to meditate when you eat. Be 100% present when you eat – focus on the smell of the food, the texture of it, the taste of it. Eat slowly, then feel the sensation in your body when it reaches your stomach. How does it make your body feel? This will also help you to make much better food choices for yourself and even lose weight because you would not be able to overeat.

This type of practice pulls you out Ego/Mind – the story of the past or future. In the present moment in such meditation, you have the access to your Soul energy. More you are able to stay there, stronger it will get, and you will start ascending. So, this last one is not really for healing. It is more for ascending :).


There is a stage before you get to ascension and before you get out of Ego Death where you must do some healing because this is what your Ego/Mind tells you to do. It is because your Ego/Mind tries to control every situation, even its own death and tries to make you do something to get more energy from you.

Not all the doing is bad. Healing is one of the things that can from one side benefit you and from other side wear out your Ego/Mind so that you can start ascending. Because your Ego/Mind will get to the point where there is nothing else it can come up for you to try.

When you are looking around to find different healing modalities to help your current situation then the best guide for the right one is your intuition. It is ok to also walk out or not finish something that does not resonate with you even if you have already paid for it. I have walked out of many such courses because I could feel the frequency of the course leader or the material itself not helping me or sometimes even working against me.

Remember, there is no right or wrong way to live your life. There is nothing wrong in practicing different healing techniques. Just trust yourself and your life and enjoy!

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